Chelsea Swan

I have finished my interim exhibition piece and I strongly dislike it. A large amount. It is overworked, over complicated. I tried putting too much of everything in it all at once. I was trying to prove something or show everything. I also hate that the yellow eyes look brown and that the yellow I sed on the frames is too bold. I have two solutions, to only bring the middle or middle three panels or to take something completely other.

On the plus side I solved a lot of new problems, so learning yay. I also did good drawing. I made little filler strips out of window insulation and added shiny to make the edges pretty in case they could be seen which I really like. I also really like the boobs.

I really did put a lot of energy and time into this but I think I would be ashamed to have it represent me. It just isn’t good enough. Or at least I know I could do better. It feels like so much pressure to have one image speak for you and your practice and where it is and where it is going.

I feel like I tried to an amalgamation of lived experiences and the way I see and interpret the world and how I am seen and all of the bing a woman stuff and I should have just focused on one thing at a time and fully explored and thought about it. The work was not quick enough to be purely instinctive and expressive, and, as I was rushing to get it done, it was not processed enough or through out enough. There are parts of it I like but all together it is so busy and distracting. I could probably find more positives, say it have something to do with the constant nature of being a woman or Adhd.

I could explain every part. I probably should for reflection an all that but I am just moving forward.